When you want to feel more self-love
• How much do you fight against your feelings?
• How easy is it for you to accept the here and now as it is?
• How much do you accept yourself with all your facets? What do you reject about yourself?
• How judgmental and critical are you about yourself? And about others? Because yes, this devaluation also has a lot to do with yourself.
• How much do you compensate in order not to feel something or to finally feel something (again)? This can be through eating, smoking, expensive cars, constantly watching Netflix or much more.
• Do you need external validation?
• How do you deal with yourself when you don´t achieve as much as you would like or are able to? Lovingly? Accepting? Or are you harsh on yourself?
• How much do you feel your needs and how easy is it for you to set boundaries and admit them for yourself?
• How do you treat the others? How fulfilling are your relationships?
• How much do you live the life you want?
Rarely has a topic been as hyped as self-love. For some, self-love means treating yourself to a spa day or a nice handbag.
And yes, that can also be a sign of self-love.
For me personally, self-love means all of the above: accepting yourself as you are, in good and bad times, with the ups and downs, standing by yourself and standing up for yourself, saying no when you feel no, enjoying the here and now and the feeling of emptiness that arises when it is very quiet, enduring, not filling, and learning to enjoy over time. And much more.
It is a life task that only ends with our last breath.
As a child, we are born as pure love. The love we receive from our caregivers and the love they feel for themselves determines how much own self-love we develop for ourselves.
The minor or major injuries of our developmental path lead us to feel more or less self-love. But self-love can also be learned in adulthood: it is a process that is not completed in 7 days, as some guides promise. For me, it is a step-by-step embodiment, a feeling of our inner beauty.